Monday, April 29, 2013

They Scalp Nazis, Don't They?

This post contains spoilers to the 2009 film, Inglourious Basterds.

So you know what's pretty cool? A few weeks ago I finally turned the age I've been telling all the ladies at the bank I am. This new age is basically the limbo between getting a driver's license and becoming a real adult, but it does have one plus: I can now finally legally watch R-rated movies in theaters and rent them from the moldy noodle-smelling place down the street.
Another thing's that's pretty cool is that I recently found out I'm going to Germany this summer. So with this new age badge and the knowledge of a future trip, I decided to rent Inglourious Basterds, because, you know, it would totally help me learn about German culture and stuff.
I've watched Django Unchained, but that's the extent of my Tarantino film knowledge. And, well, that's all I needed to really know. But I was still surprised a few times when people pulled guns out of no where and others blew innocent Germans to pieces. But I mean that's just Tarantino, making gore and the absolute pit of any country's history into a funny and well-woven movie (which, by the way, follows the conception and then execution of two different assassination attempts on Hitler in a sort of alternate-history of his time. One group made of mostly Jewish American soldiers, the Basterds- hence the title of the film- started by just scalping the Nazi soldiers- hence the title of this post- and then worked their way up to assassination).
There are a few things I noticed while watching this movie. One is that Christoph Waltz is such a babe. Like, really. It was hard to not think of him as adorable, even as he sent his men to shoot down the hiding Jewish family in France or as he strangled Diane Kruger. Another is that I could thankfully understand a little of the German spoken in the film without subtitles. And also that watching Hitler be blown to pieces is very, very satisfying.
Looking past the just-confusing spelling of the movie's title, I really liked it. Like, really. Even more than Django, and that had fucking Leonardo DiCaprio in it. That's how much I liked it, with Adorable Christoph Waltz and Funny Brad Pitt and Beautiful Eli Roth (aka the Bear Jew).
And now I totally know my German history, y'all.

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